[We need to feel sure that the needs we reveal will not be held against us.]

[Eight steps to win-win conflict resolution: 1) Take time to vent anger. 2) Pick one issue. 3) Make an appointment to talk. 4) Take three minutes for each person to express feelings with "I-statements" and without "you-messages"; focus on emotions and maybe take time between each session. 5) Brainstorm a list of solutions. 6) Remove any that can't be accepted by one of you. 7) Pick a solution for a specified period like two to four weeks. 8) Re-evaluate when the time is up.]

[Between "full agreement" and "no agreement", there is a spectrum that includes "no agreement yet" or "tolerable disagreement" or "who cares?".]

[Expect that some agreements may not work or may require change.]

[Anger can indicate what is important to someone.]