[When people try to console your loss but make you cringe, there might be an unspoken (and perhaps unintended) “so please stop feeling bad”]

[Life is more about integrating than improvement.]

most things offered as “support” in our culture are really designed to solve problems or to get you out of pain. If it feels wrong to you, it is.

[The doctor who came up with the popular ‘five stages of grief’ regrets writing them in that way because it’s not linear and universal: there is no standard process.]

[The griever and those who care about them may want a road map to guarantee success, but grief isn’t predictable or structured.]

[Culture emphasizing happy endings, solutioneering, recovery, overcoming, redemption confuses us into seeing bad things as happening ‘for growth’]

Disadvantaged people who suffer so that the more privileged can live easier are labelled ‘heroes’ to keep them working.