Journal

3 entries for Sunday, April 7, 2024

[When people try to console your loss but make you cringe, there might be an unspoken (and perhaps unintended) “so please stop feeling bad”]

[Life is more about integrating than improvement.]

most things offered as “support” in our culture are really designed to solve problems or to get you out of pain. If it feels wrong to you, it is.

[The doctor who came up with the popular ‘five stages of grief’ regrets writing them in that way because it’s not linear and universal: there is no standard process.]

[The griever and those who care about them may want a road map to guarantee success, but grief isn’t predictable or structured.]

[Culture emphasizing happy endings, solutioneering, recovery, overcoming, redemption confuses us into seeing bad things as happening ‘for growth’]


Disadvantaged people who suffer so that the more privileged can live easier are labelled ‘heroes’ to keep them working.

Part of It's OK That You're Not OK.

More useful than agreeing is to hear why we come to our conclusions.

Reducing psychological burden via ‘“they shouldn’t need to consider that” versus ‘bringing them along your process’.